Do you think that whenever you come within 50 feet of Barbara Walters your vision goes fuzzy?

I am convinced that every pristine roll of delicious Necco wafer’s is hit with a hammer on the way out of the factory. I have never eaten an intact wafer. Sure, they look like they’re all in one piece wrapped up safe and snug in their wax paper haven, but they’re all just waiting to dash my hopes against the rocky seascape composed entirely of broken candy.